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fossilesque@mander.xyzM to Science Memes@mander.xyzEnglish · 1 year ago

Brazilian Wandering Spider

mander.xyz

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Brazilian Wandering Spider

mander.xyz

fossilesque@mander.xyzM to Science Memes@mander.xyzEnglish · 1 year ago
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  • thesporkeffect@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    The erection won’t do you much good as you try to avoid going into respiratory arrest:

    Symptoms may appear within 10 to 20 minutes after the bite, and death within two to six hours, where severe pain radiates to the rest of the limb, systemic effects include tachycardia, increased blood pressure, vertigo, fever, sweating, visual disturbances, nausea, vomiting, difficulty breathing and paralysis.

    • Dyskolos@lemmy.zip
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      1 year ago

      … But… Also the erection, yes? 🤔

      • thesporkeffect@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Win some, lose some

        • MrLLM@ani.social
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          1 year ago

          Does this applies to 70 yo? Otherwise we don’t have a deal. Asking for a friend.

      • ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca
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        1 year ago

        Fully erect, like hard in the tip

        You’ll feel like a kid again

        • Dyskolos@lemmy.zip
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          1 year ago

          So, i see no downside here 😁

    • Couldbealeotard@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      The good news is you get a four hour erection.
      The bad news is that you die within two hours.

      • EffortlessEffluvium@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        Hey! Necrophiliacs need love, too!

  • Fubarberry@sopuli.xyz
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    1 year ago

    Alternative wording is gives you an erection for the rest of your life.

    • jimitsoni18@lemmy.zip
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      1 year ago

      And even a few hours after that!

  • ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    So, uh, is the spider hotter in person? Because the picture isn’t doing it for me.

    • mEEGal@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      nope.

      and it was a challengin fap indeed

      • JeezNutz@lemmy.ml
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        1 year ago

        I lasted 4 hours trying to cum

  • HelixDab2@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    FWIW, even if it only caused a four hour long erection, that is not what your partner is going to want.

    Trust me on this.

    After an hour–usually less than half an hour, IME–it’s not going to matter how much lube you have, they’re going to be hurting. You’ll be frustrated, they’ll be frustrated and in pain, and no one is going to be happy. Maybe there are a very, very few women that like getting pounded for over an hour straight, but I haven’t dated one yet.

    • OutlierBlue@lemmy.ca
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      8 months ago

      deleted by creator

    • flicker@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      In a move I’m going to regret forever, I’ll admit to the internet that I love being cuddle-fucked for literally as long as I can get it. (There’s a catch- has to be my boyfriend.)

      More than an hour and about 15 minutes and we’ll probably need some lube, though.

    • pearsaltchocolatebar@discuss.online
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      1 year ago

      After more than half an hour I just get bored.

  • Toneswirly@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Priapism isnt something you want. Eventually the blood will clot in your penis and no new blood can flow in, causing the cells in your penis to die from lack of oxygenated blood eventually leading to amputation. Better make those 4 hours count

    • jol@discuss.tchncs.de
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      1 year ago

      Brazilian doctor: I’m sorry Sr. Joaquim. You only have 1 day left to live

      Sr. Joaquim: grabs boots and very big knife

  • ImplyingImplications@lemmy.ca
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    1 year ago

    and then you die.

  • RamblingPanda@lemmynsfw.com
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    1 year ago

    Doesn’t it lead to erectile dysfunction for several months after being bitten? I mean on top of the pain and non usable erection? I guess I don’t want to try, thanks.

    • Fredselfish@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      No you die.

      • OutlierBlue@lemmy.ca
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        deleted by creator

        • Johandea@feddit.nu
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          1 year ago

          Death usually lasts longer than a few months, though…

        • 474D@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Depends on when rigor mortis sets in …

      • RamblingPanda@lemmynsfw.com
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        1 year ago

        There have been deaths, but the bite is survivable. Still extremely unpleasant

  • dustycups@aussie.zone
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    1 year ago

    That’s a challenging wank

    • chicolismo@programming.dev
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      1 year ago

      I miss Sean…

      • dustycups@aussie.zone
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        1 year ago

        Yeah.
        As a fellow baldish person I like to think I just have very vivid dreams.

  • PunnyName@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    You don’t want that spider bite: https://youtu.be/JN0VtHez9xI (12:35 SmarterEveryDay video)

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