I 5000% believed it, before seeing the sub name

Sure this is satire now. But, he’ll say this brain-dead bullshit sometime in the near future.

Shouldn’t the article have referred to him as “4029 year old Trump”?

I thought it was nottheonion at first.

I won’t be 16022109. You can’t make me. It’s not even prime! Not even prime, I say!

We’ll have the bestest numbers, the biggliest numbers, everybody’s saying so.